He has a photo collage of you at his desk
Showing four pictures representing
Four different times of your life.
He hasn’t looked at it in ages
Because it doesn’t interest him anymore.
She has a ring on her finger
You put on it four years ago.
She takes it off sometimes
When it suits her
Such as when ‘he’ comes around.
A silent partner sits anxiously waiting
His breathing is heavy, anticipating.
But this time things aren’t going to go his way.
Life celebrates the small rewards
Forget that death is what we are going towards
Because nobody likes to face the bitter truth.
He signs the paper that sells his soul
To the tune of millions he’ll be owned by this troll
Yet he thinks he’s getting the better end of the stick.
Years go by as she takes his life
He’s gotten quite a fat and lazy wife
What would you expect from a man like him?
So off he goes to an early grave
His ‘heartbroken’ wife just gives a wave
While she looks around the room to find the next.
Marriage isn’t for the faint of heart
It isn’t something we all should start
Sometimes it’s better left to ignorant fools with faith.
I sit watch the tragedy
Then say “thank God that person isn’t me”
Have another shot of tequila to their bad luck.
Yesterday I joined this fraternity
They said they would love me for eternity
And everyone knows I had to roll my eyes at that.
The last time I heard “I love you” I cried
He said he would, but he hasn’t died
In fact, everyone that said they can’t live without me is alive.
I guess maybe it is all just a lie
Meant to make us feel all good inside
When really they should have to spout the truth.
If you want a lady just for bed
You shouldn’t play with her pretty head
In fact, you really should consider masturbation.
Don’t play with women in long distance crap
She may get angry and set a trap
Where would you be without your lovely pride?
The moral of this poem is true
If you hold your breath you will turn blue
And don’t marry anyone just because you can.
If you are always honest, you will still get lies
Anyone watching too much tv thinks they are spies
And nobody tells the truth when they are nude.
So protect your heart most earnestly
Lock it up and swallow the key
And ignore the beautiful lady down the hall.